About emotional dependency
Emotional dependency shows as an intense fear of abandonment, needing constant approval or staying in relationships that cause harm. Therapy works on self-esteem, boundaries and the patterns learned in previous relationships.
Psychologists assess and treat emotional, behavioural and relationship difficulties through psychological therapy. They do not prescribe medication. In many countries clinical practice requires a specific qualification and registration with a licensing body, which Therapy247 checks.
Getting mental health care in the Congo - Kinshasa
Public health system · Ministère de la Santé publique, Hygiène et Prévention – Programme national de santé mentale (PNSM)
The national mental health programme (PNSM) has used the WHO mhGAP approach since 2011 to integrate mental health into primary care, and the Centre neuropsychopathologique (CNPP) in Kinshasa is the reference centre for mental disorders. Trained staff are very scarce, most psychiatrists work in Kinshasa, and there is no specific national mental health budget.
How to check that a professional is licensed
- Ordre des médecins de la RDC (Conseil national de l'Ordre des médecins). Created by Ordonnance-loi 68-070 of 1968; no one may practise as a doctor without being entered on the Ordre's register (tableau). Ask for proof of registration with the Ordre.
Urgent help in the Congo - Kinshasa
If your life or someone else's is in danger, call the emergency number now. These services can help at any time:
- 112 · Police (Kinshasa)
Information reviewed in November 2026 · Sources: acp.cd, acp.cd, mdpi.com, webarchive.archive.unhcr.org
Signs to look out for
Wanting closeness is human. It may be emotional dependency when your well-being depends almost entirely on one person, you feel intense anxiety at the thought of losing them, you constantly seek reassurance, give up your own needs, friends or interests to keep the relationship, or stay in relationships that hurt you because being alone feels unbearable. It can happen with partners, family or friends.
What helps: treatments and professionals
Psychologists and psychotherapists can help you understand where these patterns come from and build a more secure sense of self. Cognitive-behavioural therapy (CBT), schema therapy, attachment-focused and psychodynamic approaches are often used, as well as work on self-esteem, assertiveness and boundaries. If the relationship involves control or abuse, specialised support services can also help.
When to seek urgent help
If you are in a relationship where you are threatened, controlled, harmed or afraid, and you are in immediate danger, contact your local emergency services. Specialised domestic violence services can help you plan for safety. Seek urgent help too if the fear of losing someone, or a breakup, leads to thoughts of harming yourself or ending your life.
What you can do in the meantime
Try to rebuild areas of your life that do not depend on one person: friendships, hobbies, time alone and personal goals. Notice when you seek reassurance and practise tolerating a little uncertainty. Writing about your feelings can help you recognise patterns. Lean on people who respect you, and look for reliable information on healthy relationships and warning signs of control.
What does a psychologist do?
A psychologist spends most of the working day talking with people about what worries them and helping them change it. That includes assessing the difficulty, agreeing goals, and using structured psychological techniques in sessions with adults, teenagers, children, couples or families. Between sessions they prepare materials, write notes, and sometimes coordinate with doctors, schools or other professionals, always with your consent.
When to see a psychologist
It makes sense to see a psychologist when anxiety, low mood, stress, relationship problems, a loss or a difficult change start to affect your sleep, work or relationships, or when you simply want to understand yourself better. If symptoms are very severe, you may need medication, or there are signs of a medical cause, a psychiatrist or your doctor should be involved too.
How to choose
When choosing, check the licence and training, the approach they use and whether they have experience with what you need. Consider practical aspects too: language, price, location or online sessions and availability. The relationship with the professional matters a great deal; if after a few sessions it does not feel right, it is fine to change.
Frequently asked questions
Does the public health system in the Congo - Kinshasa cover psychological care?
The national mental health programme (PNSM) has used the WHO mhGAP approach since 2011 to integrate mental health into primary care, and the Centre neuropsychopathologique (CNPP) in Kinshasa is the reference centre for mental disorders. Trained staff are very scarce, most psychiatrists work in Kinshasa, and there is no specific national mental health budget.
How do I check that a psychologist is licensed in the Congo - Kinshasa?
Ordre des médecins de la RDC (Conseil national de l'Ordre des médecins): Created by Ordonnance-loi 68-070 of 1968; no one may practise as a doctor without being entered on the Ordre's register (tableau). Ask for proof of registration with the Ordre.