About couples therapy
Couples therapy helps partners improve communication, handle conflict, rebuild trust after a crisis or make decisions together, including separation. Sessions are usually joint, sometimes with individual meetings. It is not about deciding who is right but about understanding the patterns between you.
Sexologists help with sexual difficulties, desire, communication about sexuality, and sexual and gender identity, individually or as a couple, in a respectful and confidential setting.
Getting mental health care in the United Kingdom
Public health system · National Health Service (NHS)
Psychological therapy for anxiety and depression is free through NHS Talking Therapies in England, which accepts self-referral or GP referral; more complex needs are referred by a GP to community mental health teams. Waiting times vary by area. More information
How to check that a professional is licensed
- Health and Care Professions Council (HCPC). Titles such as practitioner psychologist, registered psychologist, clinical, counselling, educational, forensic, health, occupational and sport and exercise psychologist are protected and require HCPC registration. The bare word psychologist is not protected. Search the official register
- General Medical Council (GMC). Psychiatrists are doctors on the GMC register with a specialist entry in psychiatry. Search the official register
- Accredited Registers programme of the Professional Standards Authority (e.g. BACP, UKCP). Counsellor and psychotherapist are not protected titles; check membership of a register accredited by the Professional Standards Authority. Search the official register
Urgent help in the United Kingdom
If your life or someone else's is in danger, call the emergency number now. These services can help at any time:
- 112 · Emergencias
- 116 123 · Samaritans
- Shout
Information reviewed in November 2026 · Sources: hcpc-uk.org, regulated-professions.service.gov.uk
Signs to look out for
All couples argue. It may be time to seek help when the same arguments repeat without resolution, conversations quickly turn into criticism or silence, you feel lonely within the relationship, affection or sex have faded and that worries you, trust has been broken, or a big change such as a baby, illness or a move has unbalanced things. Considering separation is also a reason to talk.
What helps: treatments and professionals
Couples therapy approaches with good evidence include emotionally focused therapy, integrative behavioural couple therapy, cognitive-behavioural couples therapy and the Gottman method. Couples therapists, psychologists and psychotherapists with couples training usually lead the work, and a sex therapist can help when sexual concerns are central. Therapy can help couples reconnect, or separate with less damage, especially when children are involved.
When to seek urgent help
If there is physical violence, threats, sexual coercion, or you feel afraid of your partner, your safety comes first: contact your local emergency services if you are in immediate danger, and seek specialised support for domestic violence. Couples therapy is not recommended in these situations. Seek urgent help too if anyone has thoughts of suicide or harming others.
What you can do in the meantime
Choose calm moments to talk about difficult topics, rather than in the middle of an argument. Try to describe how you feel and what you need, instead of criticising. Take a break if things escalate and agree to come back to it. Make time for small moments of connection. Reading reliable information on relationships together can also open useful conversations.
What does a sex therapist do?
A sex therapist helps individuals and couples with concerns about sexuality in a respectful, confidential space. Day to day they talk about desire, arousal, pain, orgasm, sexual communication, body image, identity and orientation, and the impact of illness, ageing or past experiences. They use psychoeducation, talking therapy and practical exercises, and coordinate with doctors when a physical cause needs to be checked.
When to see a sex therapist
Seeing a sex therapist makes sense when a sexual difficulty causes distress or tension, when desire differs a lot within a couple, when there is pain or anxiety around sex, after illness, childbirth or menopause, or when you have questions about identity or orientation. A medical check-up is advisable first for pain or sudden changes; trauma may need trauma-focused therapy.
How to choose
When choosing, check the licence and training, the approach they use and whether they have experience with what you need. Consider practical aspects too: language, price, location or online sessions and availability. The relationship with the professional matters a great deal; if after a few sessions it does not feel right, it is fine to change.
Frequently asked questions
Does the public health system in the United Kingdom cover psychological care?
Psychological therapy for anxiety and depression is free through NHS Talking Therapies in England, which accepts self-referral or GP referral; more complex needs are referred by a GP to community mental health teams. Waiting times vary by area.
How do I check that a sex therapist is licensed in the United Kingdom?
Health and Care Professions Council (HCPC): Titles such as practitioner psychologist, registered psychologist, clinical, counselling, educational, forensic, health, occupational and sport and exercise psychologist are protected and require HCPC registration. The bare word psychologist is not protected.