About emotional dependency
Emotional dependency shows as an intense fear of abandonment, needing constant approval or staying in relationships that cause harm. Therapy works on self-esteem, boundaries and the patterns learned in previous relationships.
Psychotherapists are professionals trained in one or more models of psychotherapy (psychodynamic, systemic, humanistic, cognitive-behavioural…). The protected title and requirements vary by country; profiles show each professional’s training and registration.
Getting mental health care in the United States
Public health system · No single public system (Medicaid, Medicare, community mental health centers)
There is no universal public mental health service. People with low incomes may be covered by Medicaid, older adults by Medicare, and publicly funded community mental health centers and treatment facilities can be located through the federal SAMHSA locator. More information
How to check that a professional is licensed
- State boards of psychology (umbrella body: ASPPB). Psychologists are licensed by each state board; check the board of the state where you live. Use of the title psychologist generally requires a state license.
- State medical boards (umbrella body: Federation of State Medical Boards). Psychiatrists are physicians licensed by each state medical board. The FSMB DocInfo service lets you look up a physician's license and disciplinary history. Search the official register
- State licensing boards. Clinical social workers, counselors and marriage and family therapists are licensed state by state; check the relevant board in your state.
Insurance and coverage
Federal parity law (MHPAEA) requires most group health plans that cover mental health to do so on terms no more restrictive than for physical health; deductibles, copays and in-network rules still apply.
Online therapy in the United States
The clinician must normally be licensed in the state where the patient is located. Psychologists in PSYPACT member states may practice telepsychology across those states.
Urgent help in the United States
If your life or someone else's is in danger, call the emergency number now. These services can help at any time:
- 911 · Emergency (911)
- 988 · 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline
Information reviewed in November 2026 · Sources: findtreatment.gov, docinfo.org
Signs to look out for
Wanting closeness is human. It may be emotional dependency when your well-being depends almost entirely on one person, you feel intense anxiety at the thought of losing them, you constantly seek reassurance, give up your own needs, friends or interests to keep the relationship, or stay in relationships that hurt you because being alone feels unbearable. It can happen with partners, family or friends.
What helps: treatments and professionals
Psychologists and psychotherapists can help you understand where these patterns come from and build a more secure sense of self. Cognitive-behavioural therapy (CBT), schema therapy, attachment-focused and psychodynamic approaches are often used, as well as work on self-esteem, assertiveness and boundaries. If the relationship involves control or abuse, specialised support services can also help.
When to seek urgent help
If you are in a relationship where you are threatened, controlled, harmed or afraid, and you are in immediate danger, contact your local emergency services. Specialised domestic violence services can help you plan for safety. Seek urgent help too if the fear of losing someone, or a breakup, leads to thoughts of harming yourself or ending your life.
What you can do in the meantime
Try to rebuild areas of your life that do not depend on one person: friendships, hobbies, time alone and personal goals. Notice when you seek reassurance and practise tolerating a little uncertainty. Writing about your feelings can help you recognise patterns. Lean on people who respect you, and look for reliable information on healthy relationships and warning signs of control.
What does a psychotherapist do?
A psychotherapist helps people understand and change emotional, relational and behavioural patterns through a structured therapeutic relationship. Their work is shaped by one or more models, such as cognitive-behavioural, psychodynamic, systemic, humanistic or integrative therapy. They meet individuals, couples, families or groups, usually in regular sessions, and spend time outside sessions on notes, preparation and their own supervision.
When to see a psychotherapist
Psychotherapy suits people who want to work in depth on recurring difficulties: anxiety, low mood, relationship patterns, self-esteem, the effects of past experiences or major life transitions. It can also help when you feel stuck without a clear diagnosis. If you need a formal diagnosis, a specific psychological assessment or medication, a clinical psychologist or psychiatrist may need to be involved.
How to choose
When choosing, check the licence and training, the approach they use and whether they have experience with what you need. Consider practical aspects too: language, price, location or online sessions and availability. The relationship with the professional matters a great deal; if after a few sessions it does not feel right, it is fine to change.
Frequently asked questions
Does the public health system in the United States cover psychological care?
There is no universal public mental health service. People with low incomes may be covered by Medicaid, older adults by Medicare, and publicly funded community mental health centers and treatment facilities can be located through the federal SAMHSA locator.
How do I check that a psychotherapist is licensed in the United States?
State boards of psychology (umbrella body: ASPPB): Psychologists are licensed by each state board; check the board of the state where you live. Use of the title psychologist generally requires a state license.
Can I have online therapy in the United States?
The clinician must normally be licensed in the state where the patient is located. Psychologists in PSYPACT member states may practice telepsychology across those states.